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How to Handle Commitment Phobia

Rajib Singha
Let's discuss the issue of commitment phobia which leads to a lot of negative effects in a person's professional and personal life. Look at the signs and the ways to deal with this.
To define it plainly, "Commitment phobia is the fear and avoidance of having to commit to anything, relationships in particular". This condition affects almost every sphere of a person's life, especially, his or her feeling of becoming involved and keeping up with the involvement in a long-term relationship.
It also hampers the career, apart from his or her personal life. For instance, a commitment phobic person may not be able to promise stability or commitment as expected by their employer. As a result, they may not be able to establish a promising career.
People who are diagnosed with this disorder, are overburdened with a feeling of being trapped or being stuck in a situation. Such feelings and perceptions are only a small part of what goes on in the person's mind.

Commitment Phobia Signs

The signs or symptoms of commitment phobic men or women may greatly vary in their intensity and types.
However, the common symptoms include a phobic person criticizing his/her partner, and exhibiting unintentional or intentional instances of undesired behavior towards their partner, even if it means hurting the other person.
Avoiding involvement in social situations and preferring to stay at home most of the time, avoiding social interactions, failing to keep in touch with acquaintances--even friends in some cases, and protecting themselves from others getting too close are the indicative symptoms of commitment phobia.
The affected person will tend to develop unrealistic ideals such as getting close to someone he/she likes and trying to escape the situation when things get more serious.
Other symptoms include finding someone who does not show a promising attitude towards maintaining a long-term relationship or someone who is a commitment phobic himself/herself.
Another prominent symptom is a scenario wherein the phobic partner breaks away from a relationship and somehow turns up with the intention of starting all over again. Once everything is settled, his fear crops in again and he starts sabotaging the relationship.

Ways to Deal With Commitment Phobia

Overcoming this fear includes undertaking therapies which would help the patient overcome his irrational fear of being trapped or stuck in a situation which demands lifelong commitment.
These therapies aim at managing the root cause of the condition with a purpose to treat the condition with a permanent effect. Discussing your problems with your family and close friends is also seen to be helpful in many cases.
If you are able to notice symptoms, such as the ones cited here, then you should consider taking care of it right away. Merely contemplating over your condition and procrastinating the need to seek help from an expert will make matters worse, not only in your life, but in the life of others as well.
On the other hand, if you are someone who has been noticing such commitment phobic symptoms in your partner or as a matter of fact, in any of your near and dear ones, then do not have even the slightest hesitation in helping them out.
Initially, they might stop you from getting involved in their matters, but have this thought in your mind that if you give up, then your beloved will be driven towards a point from where there would be no turning back.
So, no matter how much they attempt to be uncooperative with you or get away from you, pull them with all the strength of your love and never let go.