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Mistakes Women Make in Relationships

Hemangi Harankhedkar
Relationships, the least we can say, are complex. Sometimes, you get so involved with a person that you do things that are labeled mistakes. This article discusses some common mistakes female folks make in matters of love.
Women make mistakes in relationships, knowingly or unknowingly, out of love or out of ego, out of insecurity or just to play mind games.
Whatever it may be, making mistakes is human nature and can be controlled. You should learn to deal with these misdoings, that can shake your relationship, for a less complicated future with your better half (yes, less complicated is what I wrote, you cannot be in a relationship free from obstacles or complications, can you?).
This article in no way intends to harm the sentiments of ladies, nor does it intend to harm anyone personally, one or the other mistake out of these is made by every woman in a relationship (read love). The male brigade also makes mistakes, no doubt, but following the universal rule of ladies first, let's first pinpoint the mistakes women tend to make in their love life.

1. Being Clingy

Do you expect your boyfriend to inform you about his whereabouts every hour? Do you feel the heat of insecurity when he casually talks with other females? You expect him to conduct himself the way you want, and at the worst, you have hired someone to spy over him!
If you relate to all this, you are clingy. You are also jealous and overtly possessive. I wish to ask you, what makes you a clingy girlfriend? Being excessively possessive is the first sign of missing trust, the building block of any relationship. Analyze for yourself what is making you so clingy to your boyfriend.
Sort out the things as soon as you can, before your guy runs away from you. No man with brains, will tolerate a clingy girlfriend.

2. Suspecting for No Valid Reason

Suspecting her guy for small reasons is what a lot of female folk do in a relationship. Picture this - When your guy is out-of-town and calls you, you hear a female voice in the background. Suspicion starts building and you assume he is dating some other girl in your absence.
You fight with him and make accusations with no concrete evidence. Is this suspicion justified? Your boyfriend, or say husband, might be helping a girl, considering she is his friend, or he is in a business meeting, who knows.
So, never fight or suspect if you are not sure. Will it not hamper your relationship? Next time, do suspect and fight, but only if you have a valid proof and are sure that he is indeed cheating.

3. Cheating on Him

Women are known to keep commitments and promises among both the sexes, and that is an universal fact. But the natives of Venus are also humans and can sway on finding a better prospect. You are not happy with the way the bond is shaping up, and are not fully satisfied with your boyfriend, also you do not want to leave him.
Your eyes begin to rove, you start flirting in an unhealthy way, and at last, you cheat on him! The reason for this mistake is - you didn't take the effort to enliven the dying relationship, you failed in the relationship and didn't talk it out with your boyfriend/husband.
So, take all the efforts to make the relationship work; if not, quit, but not cheat or be with two persons.

4. Making Unrealistic Demands

Some girls commit this mistake of thinking that their boyfriend is their personal property. More than the guy, they think his wallet is their own. But it is not! Just to know they are being loved, girls start making unrealistic demands from their boyfriends.
They become demanding, not realizing that he cannot afford what they demand all the time. A relationship is more about sharing your emotional securities with the other person, it is about supporting each other, it is finding yourself in the other person, rather than making material demands, or using him to fulfilling your motives and wishes.
Also, females and males are wired differently hence this big difference in thinking. So, stop expecting him to remember all your anniversaries and birthdays. This one is for your own good.

5. Excess Intrusion

This is somewhat similar to being a clingy girlfriend. Even if you are a staunch believer in - "we are two bodies, one soul", be practical. You two are two distinct individuals with two different bodies and souls, and so you just cannot cross that line the person has set for others, including you.
Learn to give each other the required space, and do not excessively intrude in his life. When he says, he needs to be alone, he means it. Give him that independence, and you both will be happy. Know that he loves you, and let him do the things he enjoys doing.
Do not force yourself to create a space in the person's life. If he wants you, he will create a big one, for sure.

6. Playing Mind Games

Not everyone in the male tribe is blessed to read the mind of a woman, which is way more complex than solving a Rubik's cube (can't think of anything else!). Do you expect your boyfriend to read your mind, and the poor guy is left guessing?
I know it is tempting to play mind games with your guy, or draining him emotionally, but you should better avoid these mind games. Guys, though as unpredictable as the weather, are quite straightforward and cannot grasp or like these drama queen tactics of emotional wars and tears.
So better leave them for your female friends, and do not always expect him to read your mind.

7. Fighting in Public

Note: Even men can start fighting in public. You hear gossip about him involved with someone at the workplace from a source, you trust or do not trust. But without thinking for a second, you give fire to the seething volcano in you.
Without finding relevancy of the information, in rage, you storm to his workplace, or any other place, and fight in full public view. Isn't it embarrassing? No matter how angry you are, this cannot be explained or justified.
Though you are fighting because you have a point, or because you love, or are deeply hurt, more than anything else, you are providing ideas to gossip mongers to spin stories, and this actually reveals the weak base of your relationship to others around. So, stop providing entertainment to gossip hungry public. 
Do defend your guy in public, but don't attack or throttle him in public. Bear in mind - You are making a fool of yourself, your partner and your relationship. This also holds true for show of affection, some guys do not like PDA and so it is better if you do not force him to show his love publicly. 

8. Losing Individuality

Are you losing your individuality being with the person? When others talk about you, it is always about you with that person. You cannot make a decision for yourself and end up consulting the person for even a small decision, informing him every little development.
Ahhh! Take some time out for yourself girl, you are making a mistake. Yes, you two are together and very much in love, but do not lose your own individuality for that person. Don't depend so much on the person, that if he leaves you tomorrow, you will find it hard to recover for a long time.
Be a strong person, pamper yourself with things you like, earn your money, spend it, enjoy with your gal friends; in short be independent and stand up for yourself.

9. Forcing Him for Marriage

If you know he loves you, you should wait for him to make the marriage move. Do not bring up the marriage topic every time you talk, it will turn your guy off, and you would end up wasting time fighting. Instead, wait for that special moment (if you are sure it will come) when your boyfriend proposes to you.
You cannot force a person to marry you, it will be a mistake and the marriage would be an unhappy one. This is a common mistake women tend to make in relationships, and can be avoided only if you understand your boyfriend.

10. Misreading the Signs

It is a well-known fact that men are more action oriented, as far as the 'expression of love' is concerned. In the initial stages of a relationship, you like the guy. You both go out for a movie and he puts his arms around you or snuggles close to you, when you are together.
You misread the signs and conclude that he is into you only physically. But as far as the above signs are concerned, keep in mind, it is his way of showing care and love for you. You better understand the signs; surely you can understand the difference in touch.
He may not feel it is necessary to call you everyday or every hour, but he does care; only his way of expressing love is different.
Knowingly or unknowingly these mistakes do occur. And they will haunt men for generations to come. But do take all the efforts to minimize them. You both have to put in equal effort to make a relationship work; you should learn to compromise, to forgive for some past misdoings.
After all, you want to derive some positives from the relationship, and it should not be a burden that will kill and frustrate you each day. So, forget the past, learn to trust, give all your love and stop expecting. Believe me, your relationship would be least complicated.