Recommended Self-help Books for Married Couples

Tap to Read ➤ Shalu Bhatti

Marriage - it wouldn't be wrong to call it a bittersweet journey of ups and downs. While the ups are cherished moments that form the essence of a happy marriage, the downs are also important as they put couples through a rough patch. Here are some recommended self-help books for married couples.

So it's not gonna be easy. It's going to be really hard; we're gonna have to work at this everyday, but I want to do that because I want you. I want all of you, forever, everyday. You and me... everyday. ― Nicholas Sparks, The Notebook

The journey of living together, revealing each and every bit of oneself, not only paves way for intimacy, but also conflicts. The initial phase of a marriage is full of excitement―the excitement to know each other, to explore each other, and to be under each other's care; as time passes by, this proximity begins to seem more like an obligation.

Call it the result of a monotonous routine, perceived behavioral tendencies or lack of compatibility, the tide begins to seem turbulent where things were once smooth sailing. Many married couples succumb to this initial drift that eventually turns into irreconcilable differences. They need to take the effort to mend these gaps by working on their marriage.

While there does come a time when it may seem impossible to talk it out with one another, there are various ways through which one can find what once seemed a non-attainable solution to their marital differences. Not all couples are comfortable discussing their personal matters with others, even with a counselor.

However, if you truly wish to do something about your marriage, that is losing its strength and charm with each passing day, there are various self-help books that can help you bridge the gap and ensure that the bridge gets stronger. Read ahead for a list of some recommended options, that will surely change your marital life to a happily ever after one.

Recommended Must-reads for Married Couples

Books are our friends that don't judge, don't intrude, and don't spread the word around.

They are the ultimate source of guidance that not only counsel you in your time of need, but keep your issues private from gossip mongers. Yes, you can avail the benefits of these highly-trustworthy confidantes, provided you know where to go. Numerous books have been written on the subject by varied authors.

Each author has his own flair of writing, which may or may not appeal to esurient readers. Which is why, we have prepared a special list for you that consists of some of the many appreciated works of authors, who have successfully penned their experience and understanding of what it takes to make a marriage successful, and the relationship infrangible.

His Needs, Her Needs: Building an Affair-Proof Marriage, by Willard F. Jr. Harley

Dr. Harley is a marriage counselor and a nationally acclaimed clinical psychologist. He has authored many other books, in this book, he focuses on the emotional needs of a man and his wife. This book unravels the mysteries of indifference, frustration, affairs and a failed marriage. He explains how each person is unique in the way they think and function.

He also explains how it is important to learn how to focus on their emotional desires, which he distinctively categorizes under 10 points, namely: Admiration, affection, conversation, domestic support, family commitment, financial support, honesty and openness, physical attractiveness, recreational companionship, and sexual fulfillment.

The 5 Love Languages: The Secret to Love That Lasts, by Gary Chapman

Haven't you felt unloved, even if your partner continues to say that they love you? Dr. Chapman brilliantly puts forth in his book, the five different languages of love, along with quizzes to help you identify what the language of love is. He categorizes these into five sections: Quality time, words of affirmation, gifts, acts of service, and physical touch.

He clearly states and explains how each person has his own way of expressing love. Consider this book as a complete guide that not only helps you learn and identify your partner's behavior, but also gives you practical steps to work towards building a never-ending journey of love and companionship.

Love & Respect: The Love She Most Desires; The Respect He Desperately Needs, by Emerson Eggerichs

Dr. Eggerichs has over three decades worth of counseling experience, and this book does a commendable job in summarizing what he and his wife have been imparting to troubled couples. As the title suggests, this book focuses on the two requisites of a successful relationship―love and respect.

While a wife seeks love from her husband, a husband wants his wife to respect him unconditionally. Dr. Eggerichs also brings about a biblical angle to this book, explaining the relationship of a man and wife in the true sense, as God intended it to be. This book will surely reveal the purity in the bond of marriage, without which a relationship is nothing.

The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work, by John Gottman, Nan Silver

In this marriage-saving book, author John Gottman puts his years of experience and blends it with a mix of his romantic self. This book introduces an all-new facet of married life, where the author successfully explains his research and study on the subject into seven principles.

This book also consists of exercises and practical questionnaires, that helped many couples―who once faced the harsh winds of marital indifference―to live together in harmony, appreciating their bond more than ever.