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How to Deal With an Unhappy Marriage

Bidisha Mukherjee
An unhappy marriage is one of the most painful experiences in life for any couple. This article contains some guidelines that will tell you how to deal with an unhappy marriage.
Marriage is a very delicate relationship, and a happy marriage is based upon love, trust, faith, and mutual respect. Nobody knows when a relationship between married couples can get bitter. It may be triggered by a minor misunderstanding, while sometimes, it could be a more serious issue.
Whatever be the cause, when a couple is stuck in an unhappy marriage, it is a stressful situation for both the people. In many cases, couples refuse to accept that there are some marital problems.
They just assume that it is a passing phase, and that they will be able to overcome it. By the time both of them realize their marriage is in trouble, it is too late and not much can be done to save the marriage.

Signs of Marital Strife

The warning signs of marital discord are noticeable much before a separation or a divorce actually happens. Some couples tend to ignore them, while others fail to identify them. The most vital signs are as follows:
  • Frequent fights and arguments, which may turn abusive or violent at times.
  • Lack of communication between the partners. This happens when the couple distances themselves from each other so much that they do not feel the need to have a conversation or discussion on any issues.
  • Frequency of lovemaking has either gone down or there is no physical intimacy at all.
  • The emotional bond that often keeps a couple together goes missing. As a result, they no longer share their dreams or future plans with each other.
  • Such couples often refuse to include their spouse in their lives. When they are at home, they keep themselves busy by watching TV, reading books, or drinking alcohol. When they are outside, they prefer spending times with their respective friends or indulge in other activities all alone.

Dealing with an Unhappy Marriage

There are certain steps which, when taken into account, can help to restore the warmth and happiness in a relationship. Some of them are as follows
  • Improve Communication:
    The first step is to start sharing your feelings, concerns, and expectations with your spouse. This way, you can clear out many of the misunderstandings that existed between both of you in the past. It is not just venting out your anger, but having an open discussion on issues that are bothering both of you.
  • Forgive and Forget:
    If your spouse has committed some mistakes in the past which has made you unhappy, try to forget that incident and forgive your partner. This is not easy to do, but you can give it a try just for the sake of your marriage. 
Moreover, bottling up anger or grievances will make you more depressed. If you manage to forgive, you will feel liberated.
  • Stay Positive:
    When you are getting negative vibes from your surroundings, it is very important to keep yourself positive from within. Do not stop caring for your personal needs, otherwise, you will lose motivation and feel depressed. 
This is not good for your physical, as well as mental, health. Maintain your physical health by eating the right kind of food, doing regular exercises, and sleeping 8 hours at night. Relax your mind by involving yourself in activities that you love to do.
  • Spend Quality Time with Each Other:
    Today, we all lead such a busy life that we fail to squeeze out any time for our partners. As a result, misunderstandings, regrets, and annoyance crop up, leading to an unhappy relationship. In order to get rid of all such negative emotions, it is important to spend some quality time exclusively with each other. 
For this, you have to plan your schedule in such a way that you can devote at least one hour in a day for your spouse. A weekend pleasure trip, a long drive, or a candle light dinner can help to renew the bond.
We are aware of the fact that marriage is all about facing the challenges of life together. Consider an unhappy marriage as a difficult phase of life, and deal with it sensibly. When you make some positive efforts, you will be able to ease off the tension and resolve the issue amicably. Once you are out of this crisis, you will realize that your marital bond has strengthened!